Today

I've been reflecting on the day.  It started out really messy.  Neither the kids nor I greeted the day ready to love and serve one another.  We were crabby!  The relational dynamics in every direction were ugly.  Within a short period of time there was plenty of crying, arguing, and raising voices.  I was frustrated.  My selfishness and impatience as I related to the kids wasn't helping anything.

 Yes, they know how to push each other's buttons.

In a very real way, I was at the end of myself.  I was disgusted by my attitude and how it was affecting my interactions.  Yet, I couldn't change it.  I couldn't muster the will-power to flip some kind of selfless, patience switch.  In a moment of raw realization of my utter sinfulness, I was tempted to feel guilty and defeated.  Instead, I flopped on the couch and invited the kids to snuggle up and join me.  And then we prayed.  We talked a bit about how cranky and selfish we were all feeling.  I apologized to them and together, we asked God to intervene.  It was a sweet moment, but surprise...it wasn't magical!  We didn't instantly have more patience or enjoyment of one another.  There was still an undercurrent of cranky.

Shortly after praying together, a neighbor replied to a text I had sent her several days ago in which I had invited them to come play this morning.  She asked if we were still up for a playdate.  I replied, "Sure.  Come over anytime!  We are crabby and kind of a mess, so we could use some company.  :)"  She and her two small kiddos knocked on the door shortly after.  We hugged and gave each other a really warm, knowing smile as we observed our matching get-up...yoga pants, sweatshirt, and unstyled hair.  We proceeded to have a really refreshing time together.

In reflection, I am so in awe of God at work in our morning.  He seemed to put me in a place of complete need and dependence just before my neighbor came to visit.  Instead of trying to pull myself together to fit an image, I invited her into our mess.  I let myself be humbled by the reality of my sin.  In doing so, she felt so welcome to "come as she was".  She shared her heart and life openly in return.

And at the end of our visit we all had a little more perspective.  The kids and I were able to extend more grace to one another.  We even ended up enjoying one another.  Thank you, Lord!

These two are so worth enjoying.